Arranged marriage facts for kids
An arranged marriage is when a couple's decision to marry is made by people other than themselves. Often, their parents or older family members make this choice. Sometimes, religious leaders, teachers, or close family friends might also be involved.
Today, arranged marriages are most common in parts of Southern Asia, Africa, and the Middle East. They are also seen in some East and Southeast Asian cultures. An arranged marriage is not just about two people joining. It is also about two families forming a connection.
Unlike forced marriages, people in an arranged marriage usually have a say. They are often given suggestions for a partner and can choose to accept or refuse.
Many people in Western countries have different ideas about marriage. In the West, it is common to build a strong emotional bond with someone before thinking about marriage. However, studies have shown interesting results about love in arranged marriages. While they might start with less love, after about 10 years, couples in arranged marriages often report having more love than those in non-arranged marriages. In non-arranged marriages, the level of love can sometimes decrease over time.
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What is an Arranged Marriage?
An arranged marriage happens when family members or other trusted people choose a husband or wife for someone. This is different from a "love marriage," where people choose their own partners based on romantic feelings. The main idea behind arranged marriages is to bring two families together. It is seen as a way to create strong family ties and support systems.
Who Decides in an Arranged Marriage?
Usually, the parents or the oldest members of the family make the decisions. They look for a partner who will be a good match for their child and their family. This often means considering things like family background, religion, education, and social status. Sometimes, a matchmaker, who is a person specializing in finding suitable partners, might help.
How is it Different from a Forced Marriage?
It is important to know the difference between an arranged marriage and a forced marriage. In an arranged marriage, the person getting married usually has the right to say "yes" or "no." They can meet the suggested partner and decide if they want to marry them. In a forced marriage, however, a person is made to marry against their will. They do not have a choice. Forced marriages are illegal in many parts of the world.
Where are Arranged Marriages Common?
Arranged marriages have been a tradition for thousands of years in many cultures. While they are less common in Western countries today, they are still widely practiced in other parts of the world.
- South Asia: Countries like India, Pakistan, Bangladesh, and Sri Lanka have a long history of arranged marriages.
- Middle East and North Africa: Many communities in this region also practice arranged marriages.
- Parts of Africa: Various cultures across Africa continue this tradition.
- East and Southeast Asia: While less common than before, some arranged marriages still occur in countries like Japan, China, and Korea.
Why Do People Choose Arranged Marriages?
There are several reasons why families and individuals choose arranged marriages. These reasons often come from cultural beliefs and values.
- Family Values: Arranged marriages often strengthen family bonds and ensure that family traditions continue.
- Economic Stability: Families might look for partners who can provide financial security. This helps both individuals and their families.
- Social Status: Marrying into a respected family can improve a family's social standing in the community.
- Shared Values: Families try to find partners who share similar religious, cultural, and moral values. This can lead to a more harmonious life together.
- Parental Wisdom: Parents believe their life experience helps them choose a good partner for their child. They might see things their child cannot.
What About Love in Arranged Marriages?
Many people in Western cultures believe that love must come before marriage. However, studies show that love can grow and deepen over time in arranged marriages.
- Love Can Grow: Research suggests that couples in arranged marriages often develop strong love and affection for each other. This love can even become stronger than in some non-arranged marriages over many years.
- Different Kind of Love: The love in arranged marriages might start differently. It often grows from respect, shared goals, and commitment to the family.
- Focus on Partnership: These marriages often focus on building a strong partnership and family unit. This foundation can lead to lasting happiness and love.
Images for kids
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"Marriage à-la-mode" by William Hogarth: a satire on arranged marriages and prediction of ensuing disaster
See also
In Spanish: Matrimonio concertado para niños