J. B. Morton facts for kids

John Cameron Andrieu Bingham Michael Morton, known as J. B. Morton (born June 7, 1893 – died May 10, 1979), was a funny English writer. He was famous for writing a newspaper column called "By the Way." He used the pen name 'Beachcomber' in the Daily Express newspaper from 1924 to 1975.

Famous writers like G. K. Chesterton and Evelyn Waugh praised Morton's humor. Chesterton said Morton had "a huge thunderous wind of elemental and essential laughter." Waugh believed he had "the greatest comic fertility of any Englishman."

Morton's Early Life

Morton was born in Tooting, London, at Park Lodge on Mitcham Road. He was an only child. His father, Edward Morton, was a serious journalist and theater critic. Morton's mother, Rosamond Bingham, passed away when he was 12 years old.

From age eight, Morton went to Park House prep school in Southborough, London. In 1907, he moved to Harrow School but did not like it. Harrow later inspired his fictional school, Narkover, which was a place with lots of bad behavior and trouble. Morton was accepted into Worcester College, Oxford. However, he could not get a scholarship. He had to leave after one year to help his father, who had become ill.

Morton did not have a very successful school career. He left Oxford wanting to be a poet. But his talent for poetry turned out to be limited.

Morton's Career Path

Starting His Career

Morton quickly realized he could not earn a living from poetry. He found a job writing for a musical show. This job was stopped when World War I began in 1914. He joined the army as a private in the Royal Fusiliers. The next year, he was sent to fight in the trenches. His army group was disbanded in 1916. Morton then became an officer in the Suffolk Regiment. After fighting in the Somme area, he was sent home. He suffered from stress due to the war. He spent the rest of the war working in intelligence.

After the war, Morton wrote a novel called The Barber of Putney. It was based on his experiences in the trenches. It was published in 1919. In the same year, he started writing for the Sunday Express newspaper. He had a weekly column filled with jokes and poems. He also wrote essays about cross-country walking, which was his favorite hobby. In 1922, he moved to the Daily Express as a reporter. But he did not enjoy being a regular reporter. Morton later said, "I remember being asked to interview the mother of a boy who'd killed someone. As I went along in the cab, I thought: 'D'you realise what you're doing?' Then I decided I couldn't go on."

Becoming Beachcomber

On July 7, 1917, the "By the Way" column first appeared in the Express. At first, it was 900 words of news and comments. Major John Bernard Arbuthnot started the new column. He also created the 'Beachcomber' pen name a week later. In 1919, he was promoted. D. B. Wyndham Lewis, the newspaper's literary editor, took over the column. Like Morton, Wyndham-Lewis had also served in the war. They both had a unique sense of humor. They also both loved France. Wyndham-Lewis created the funny, dream-like style that the column became known for. He published the first collection of Beachcomber's writings in 1922. It was called A London Farrago.

Morton and Wyndham-Lewis became good friends quickly. Their constant joking could be heard across the top floor of the building. So, when Wyndham Lewis moved to the Daily Mail in April 1924, Morton was the clear choice to continue the column. He made the humor lighter over time. He also introduced many characters who appeared regularly. Morton published his first Beachcomber collection, Mr Thake, in 1929. He published 17 more collections over the next 30 years.

In his early years, Morton wrote his column in the Express offices. He was known for laughing out loud and dancing after finishing each part. A day's column only took a few hours. He always wrote a week ahead. This meant his afternoons were free for meeting friends. Later, he would mail his handwritten column from wherever he was.

Morton liked the 'Beachcomber' name because it helped him stay anonymous. He enjoyed this until his identity was revealed in the 1930s. Drawings in the column showed Beachcomber as a young woman. Many people thought the column was written by several different people. With this cover, Morton often shared his strong opinions. He wrote about new inventions, drivers, and art he thought was too fancy.

Under Morton's writing, By the Way continued for many years. It survived the paper shortages of World War II. During the war, the Express newspaper shrank to only four pages. His jokes about both Nazi ideas and complicated British rules helped people feel better. Morton was honored with the CBE award in 1952. In 1965, the column became larger and was published weekly.

The very last column appeared on November 29, 1975. Its headline was "Lawnmower Used on Vet's Whiskers."

A BBC radio show called Beachcomber by the Way was based on the column. It aired for 18 episodes from 1989 to 1994. Richard Ingrams played the voice of Beachcomber. John Wells, John Sessions, and Patricia Routledge played other roles. John Wells often played Prodnose, a curious character who always asked Beachcomber what he meant.

Other Writings

Morton also wrote some books about French history. He wrote them in the style of his good friend Hilaire Belloc. But these books were not widely read and are now mostly forgotten. After he retired, he started writing his life story. However, he said it would be "boring" and tore up his notes. Another of his works is SPRINGTIME: Tales of the Café Rieu. It describes life in the Left Bank area of Paris.

Friends and Funny Adventures

Morton became friends with people in J. C. Squire's group. Squire was the editor of the London Mercury. He was known for helping young writers. He had a group of writers and poets. Morton enjoyed joining them on trips to pubs near Fleet Street. Squire's amateur cricket team is described in England, Their England by A. G. Macdonell. The lively character Tommy Huggins in that book is based on Morton.

This also led him to meet Hilaire Belloc. Belloc's second son, Peter, became a close friend of Morton's until Peter's death in 1941. Belloc was 52 when Morton met him. Both Belloc and Morton enjoyed walking across the countryside. They would make up songs as they walked. The three of them also sailed Belloc's boat, the Nona. Like Belloc, Morton was a Roman Catholic. He shared many of the ideas of the Chesterton–Belloc group.

Morton loved to bring his funny, dream-like ideas into everyday life, not just his writing. One day, while walking through Guildford with Gerald Barry, Morton stopped at a pillar box (a mail box). He spoke into its opening: "Are you alright, my little man? Don't worry, we'll soon get you out." Soon, a worried crowd gathered to see who was stuck inside. Someone even called the fire brigade for help. Morton and Barry quietly left the scene. Events like this happened quite often. Another time, he left many empty brown ale bottles on Virginia Woolf's doorstep as a funny trick.

Wyndham-Lewis remembered their first meeting. He said the door "burst open." Then, "a thick-set, country-looking figure, all over straw and clay, strode in." He "banged passionately on the floor with a thick gnarled stick." He let out a roar that became known and feared in every pub on Fleet Street: "Flaming eggs! will no one rid me of this stinking town?"

Later Life and Family

In 1927, Morton married Mary O'Leary, an Irish doctor. This changed his social life and his time in London. To avoid the Labour government of the late 1940s, the couple moved to Dublin for two years. Then they moved to Ferring in Worthing. Moving around did not stop his column. Morton wrote it by hand (he never learned to type) on blue Basildon Bond paper. He then mailed it to the Express. However, his new lifestyle did affect his writing. Morton's writing became more cynical. He became "a gloomy little man," according to his illustrator Nicolas Bentley. Richard Ingrams, who edited some Beachcomber collections, said Morton was "heavy-going and uncommunicative" in his later years.

The couple were happy together until Mary passed away in 1974. Morton lost his job the year after. His forced retirement was not a happy time. He lived alone and struggled with daily tasks. He became quite lonely. Morton eventually moved into a nursing home. He insisted on calling all the ladies there Mary. After he passed away in 1979, at age 85, his house was torn down. All his papers were destroyed.

Works

• The Barber of Putney (1919)
• Gorgeous poetry, 1911–1920 (1920)
• Penny royal (1921)
• Enchanter's Nightshade (1921)
• Old Man's Beard (1923)
• The Cow Jumped Over the Moon: A Story (1923)
• Hark Backward: A Sporting Novel (1929)
• Sobieski, king of Poland (1932)
• Maladetta (1932)
• 1933 and still going wrong (1932)
• Who's who in the zoo (1933)
• Hag's Harvest (1933)
• Tally-ho! and other hunting noises (1934)
• Vagabond (1934)
• The death of the dragon: new fairy tales (1934)
• Skylighters (1934)
• The Barber of Putney (1934, revised version of 1919 novel)
• The Bastille falls, and other studies of the French revolution (1936)
• Gallimaufry (1936)
• The Dauphin (1937)
• Pyrenean; being the adventures of Miles Walker on his journey from the Mediterranean to the Atlantic (1938)
• The New Ireland (1938)
• Saint-Just (1939)
• St. Martin of Tours (193?)
• Bridge over the rainbow: a survey of humorous sketches (1940)
• The Gascon, a story of the French Revolution (1946)
• Brumaire, the rise of Bonaparte; a study of French history from the death of Robespierre to the establishment of the Consulate (1948)
• Camille Desmoulins, and other studies of the French Revolution (1950)
• St. Therese of Lisieux, the making of a saint (1954)
• Hilaire Belloc: A Memoir (1955)
• Springtime : tales of the Café Rieu (1956)
• Marshal Ney (1958)

See also under Beachcomber (pen name)

See also

• The Queen's Book of the Red Cross

Sources